The Color of Love - a book I did not like

 

The Color of Love 

by Marra B. Gad

2/5 stars

⭐⭐

I finished this book early in July.

In the Color of Love, Marra Gad explores and explains her life as a bi-racial Jewish woman, about to turn 50. It is really more like 2 books, the first about her experience growing up bi-racial and feeling rejected both by Jews and by blacks. The second part is about her experience taking guardianship of her Great-Aunt Nette (who always disliked her and treated her poorly) as Nette develops Alzheimer's. 

I am a Jewish woman about the same age as Ms. Gad who belongs to a reform congregation in the Chicago suburbs. I do not want to discount any of Ms. Gad's experiences, but I can’t help but wonder where she was going, because in our congregation, we have numerous interracial families, and everyone is welcome. We are delighted to have anyone sit and pray, and would never ask anyone "why are you here?" or "Should you be in the kitchen?? " NEVER.

Everyone's experiences are unique and their own, and I am sure that Ms. Gad suffered greatly to have written it all down in this book. For me, after a while, it was the same-same over and over. Yes, it was terrible, get over it, grow up, and move on. In the part about Nette and Alzheimer's, I felt if possible, even more alienated. Ms. Gad goes on about how she thinks or has this belief that as Alzheimer's develops you go back to your original state of "pure love", and her Aunt became so sweet and nice, and would say, "Hello pretty lady" to her. Well hooray for you, aren't you the lucky one? I have very recently lost a very close relative with severe dementia/Alzheimer's, and they became the meanest, nastiest, most difficult version of themselves. I could barely read this book, and I 100% certainly could not relate. Again, I realize my experience was mine, and Ms. Gad's experience was hers, and unique to her, but don't try to tell me that a state of pure love is what happens to Alzheimer’s patients…

I really did NOT like this book one little bit, I didn’t like anything about it, I thought the author was whiny, privileged, and self-indulgent. I will say however, it made me think, and I was thinking about it for days.